Recently, I found myself stretched out on the examination table of an urgent care office, hooked up to an EKG machine. It was the last place I imagined I’d be, especially since I’d just returned from an incredibly restful weekend celebrating my birthday – and only a few weeks before that I’d come back to work from extended personal time off.
Yet, there I was in the doctor’s office, trying to manage the most excruciating chest pain I’d ever experienced.
As the nurse fired a series of questions at me, I anxiously awaited the answer to my most pressing question: What’s the problem?
Thankfully, everything checked out physically. I could quiet the wandering thoughts about wills and life insurance, since I obviously wasn’t dying.
However, the diagnosis left me slightly embarrassed. The condition is commonly associated with stress and anxiety, and I was pretty confident I knew the trigger.
At that moment, the most pressing question shifted from “What’s the problem?” to “How did I get here?”
For anyone who is or knows a high achiever, you’re aware we can take on a lot more than normal and take pride in our ability to do so without falling apart. Yet, eventually we all find our limits, and I was in the middle of discovering mine.
The hard lesson here is that our abilities and strengths, apart from God, can leave us lying on a bed in an emergency room.
All of this reinforces why I started my blog Flourishing Lane. There’s a wealth of advice out there on productivity and balance, but you’d be hard pressed to find anything that addresses the spiritual aspect that corporate individuals like me face. We are all spiritual beings–whether or not we share the same beliefs or practices, and recognizing this can have a huge influence on how we handle life’s pressures and challenges. Ignoring this truth comes with it's own repercussions, too.
So, when I reassessed my situation with my spirit and beliefs top of mind, and I revisited the questions “What’s the problem?” and “How did I get here?” and I saw where I had gone wrong.
I’d been pushing a boulder up a hill for the last year, pouring my all into conquering a particular challenge. Somewhere along the way, it became more about what I can give and do to overcome the challenge–which conventional wisdom would encourage because “you’ve got this”– and it became less about what God can do in and through me because of the challenge.
Our skills and hard work are important, but try as we might, no work ethic, track record or skill can sustain us alone. We all have our limits. I hope sharing this story nudges you to proactively take a step back and nurture your spirit before life circumstances force you to.
A gentle reminder: Zechariah 4:6
-J'Nae
